Note: This is a re-write of a personal Rant I did before. I don’t save my Rants and can’t locate them from the website. Yesterday I received more important information on the prior Rant that I felt you might get a kick out of.
I dated my wife three months before she met my mother, I think she was gun shy to do so, with reason. Before Betty consented to the blind date, she checked up on me; you know her! She knew I had one brother (John) and six sisters (Judy, Jenny, Jacky, Jane, Joyce, Jean and Janet). She knew of my father’s fetishes of making Js and smoking afterward.
He and four teenage buddies rolled up the windows in a car to see how much cigarette smoke they could get in it. They all got sick that night and only one of them smoked as adults, and that was a pipe sparingly. Dad could walk into the house and immediately know if someone smoked in it. He would go off like a tyrant. Word apparently got out if you ran around with a Costa you had better not smoke. Betty was a Marlboro girl.
We ran into my sister Janet at a happy hour. She had been telling her friends about my 72 year old mother that lives to dance and dress up for Halloween parties. Janet and my other sisters have to “accessorize” her all the time, like you do a paper doll. When we joined her they were all laughing and Janet said I had to go to the Halloween dance immediately and see Mom’s costume. That was all she would tell me.
So Betty and I got up and went. On the way there Betty was nervous as she was not properly dressed, not prepared, on and on. I was concerned about her as she was trying to suck the front end of a cigarette through the filter knowing it would be her last one for the night.
I introduced Betty to Mom and her date. He was dressed as a starving artist with a handful of paints, brushes, paint smears on him, etc. Mom is a small blond. She was wearing a silk robe and sporting a long blond wig hanging down to her waist. They were so cute together.
After five minutes of chatting a small crowd came over to our table. According to manners (we’re in the South you know), I stood and Betty remained seated. The crowd leaders demanded “Ruth, show us your costume.” Mom stood with her back to me and opened the robe. The crowd roared as she turned to me. She was neked!!
I went into shock and didn’t know how to react. I looked down at Betty for support but I got none. All I saw was her with a shit-eating grin on her face as she was lighting up, looking like “What the hell can she say about my smoking?”
As it turned out, Mom was wearing a flesh colored Tee shirt with breasts air brushed on it, nude panties with nude panty hose and an appropriately placed piece of fur.
Yesterday I was with my visiting sister Jane. I told her I wish I had a picture from that night.
See three attached pictures.
