Jim's Rant For The Day. The Quaker and the Vax Door Knocker.
I am reminded of the story of a Quaker that was awakened by the sound of a burglar downstairs. He went to the top of the stairs with a shotgun and hollered out "Friend, thee needs to know that I am a Quaker and will not harm thee. But thee also needs to know that I am about to shoot at the very spot thee is standing on."